Cautious optimism

To say that the last few days have been terrifying is an understatement. Keith and I have been beside ourselves with worry, fear and most importantly, love for our dog Maude.

I will take you through the series of events because I think it will be cathartic for me to do so.

On Saturday night we noticed that Maude had what appeared to be an ear infection. These things happen, we didn’t think anything of it. On Sunday morning we made an appointment at the Beaches Animal Hospital but they couldn’t see us until 1:40 p.m. I was weary about this all morning because I have noticed in the past that when Maude has an infection or a higher temperature than normal she usually goes into seizures.

The seizures don’t last long. Usually under a minute. She usually has one and maybe about 30 minutes later she’ll have a smaller one, and that will be it, she’ll be fine for another two months. She is on medication, but the neurologist warned us when she was diagnosed back in December that it’s all trial and error until we find the right drug at the right dose. Maude’s seizures don’t really phase us anymore because we know that she is no pain, has no idea that it’s even happening and when they’re done, she’s back to her normal self, albeit a bit more tired than usual.

The second seizure on Sunday was longer, and I noticed shortly before she succumbed to it that she was in pain, and unable to sleep. I told Keith to call the vet and tell them that we’re taking her in early, and that they would have to see her. When we got to the vet, as she was being weighed, she seized again. She has had three seizures in one day before, so again, we thought nothing of it. The vet instructed us to go home and they will observe her over the next few hours.

An hour later, I was cleaning when I got the call that Maude had entered into a sustained seizure that they were incapable of stopping with Valium, a drug that typically works in these situations. They called her neurologist who was out having lunch with our regular vet who instructed that Maude needed to be anesthetized immediately to prevent brain damage. The vet told us that we would have to take Maude to the intensive care unit 30 minutes away and so we rushed to find Maude basically comatose. She looked dead. I don’t know where we got the strength to carry on after this, but survival mode kicked in.  We managed to pull ourselves together and be there for her. There was no choice.

To transport Maude the vet would have to wake her up, but they warned us that there was no guarantee that she would not go back into her seizure. As I sat in the back seat of the car stroking and soothing my beautiful Maude, Keith drove through every red light imaginable to get her to the emergency as soon as possible. We got there in 20 minutes and Maude did not have one seizure. Thank God.

I carried her back to the ICU where a swarm of doctors treated her immediately. She vomited, they tried their best to get all the fluids out and onto the floor, but were unsuccessful and now she has pneumonia. We learned that at 1 a.m. Monday.

We were told to go back to the waiting room and that the doctor would be with us as soon as she was able to. I looked back to see Maude’s eyes, staring at us, helpless and beautiful. I cried, and I sobbed, but I was confident that everything was going to be okay.

As of right now Maude is awake, has not had a seizure in over 48 hours and is slowly regaining her strength. I hope to never have to go through this again.

The doctors have been amazing. Their compassion and expertise has been refreshing and helpful. Right now they have a seizure plan in place, and are hoping that Maude will eat and drink on her own soon. The best estimate is that she will be able to come home tomorrow, but I think Friday is more likely.

I went to visit her twice yesterday and brought along her favourite toy, and asked the nurses to make sure it’s always by her side. I lied down next to her and she tilted her head so that it was resting near mine. I cried more.

Thank you to everyone who has sent Maude well-wishes. I really believe that the positivity has made a difference, and I know that we are going to get through this and Maude will make a full recovery.

Maude be okay. Maude get better. xoxoxoxo